How Many Licks DOES it Take? Pam Clavin Knows
April 28, 2008
You’ll remember that I accrued the nickname Pam Clavin a few years back thanks to my ability to rattle off random facts about anything. Well, she’s out in full force these days. On Friday, while keeping safe distance from the water for fear of being gnawed to death by JAWS, I was laying on the beach with a group of friends. I had my nose in a book (Fair Game by Valerie Plame Wilson, the CIA agent Cheney’s Chief of Staff outed) and was keeping to myself and my fantasy world: since I’m having a crap time finding a job and my dream job is to work overseas at an embassy in public affairs and media relations, sometimes I dream I’m a spy (I am not ashamed so guffaw all you want).
Back to the story: I was faintly aware of someone eating a Tootsie Pop and saying they didn’t like the chocolately goodness found inside (AKA the BEST part). Of course someone asked the age-old question: How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? My head immediately shot up as I exclaimed, “Oh! I know this one! It’s 211. I saw a special on the Food Network the other night and they had this machine created by students at MIT that…”
Have you ever been in one of those situations where there’s all this noise and then silence, with EVERYONE is looking at you? Even people sitting a few towels over? That was one of those moments: complete unbelief, a few slack jaws, sunglasses pulled to the edge of noses, raised eyebrows. It was my first Pam Clavin moment with these people. No one could stifle their giggles so we all laughed.
I am pretty dorky. The final question that separated me from all the other dorks in high school competing for a coveted spot on the Quiz Bowl team was: Which NFL team does NOT have any insignia, logo, or stripes on players’ helmets? Yes, it was the Cleveland Browns. Did you know that ice cream cones were created after the British government stopped street vendors from reusing glass shot-type glasses for customers to prevent the spread of Hepatitis? Coca-Cola removes acid from car batteries. Due to the shortages of lead and metals during WWII, toothpaste was packaged in plastic tubes and has been ever since. The key to the Bastille is on display in the hall at George Washington’s home, Mt. Vernon.
Does it really surprise anyone that I was on the Quiz Bowl team for 2 years in high school or was in the Library Club? Didn’t think so. Here’s hoping dorks take over the world, but only after we’ve had fashion emergency make overs.
Entry Filed under: Embarrassing stories, Getting older, Humor, I do dumb things, memories, random facts. .
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1.
Sarah | April 28, 2008 at 3:22 pm
I know that moment of silence. Does it take you a few minutes to realize that everyone is staring at you too? Yeah, I know that moment well…
2.
travelrat | April 29, 2008 at 3:36 am
Let’s see …
Monaco has the shortest coastline in the world
The longest continuous Royal line is the Oldenburgs of Denmark. Denmark has the oldest unchanged national flag, too.
The Caribbean end of the Panama Canal is further east than the Pacific end.
Stewart Grainger’s real name is James Stewart
The only film that Clark Gable appeared in without his moustache was ‘Mutiny on the Bounty’ … because British sailors must grow a ‘full set’ or be clean-shaven.
Try working those into a conversation!
3.
Billy | April 29, 2008 at 6:17 am
Did you know bees and dogs can smell fear?!?!
I only associate with dorky people so you’re safe in my book.
4.
Lynne | April 29, 2008 at 6:20 am
You’re not a dork and you have no fashion problems! Just smart and that’s a good thing.
5.
The Last Spartan | April 29, 2008 at 7:15 am
Wow, what a repository of facts! The Browns, however, do have stripes on their helmets but no logo.
Of course, if I could forget all of the useless sports trivia that I know…perhaps I could remember some life-saving piece of information.
6.
Kacey | April 29, 2008 at 1:23 pm
I’ve never thought of you as a dork but this post was hilarious just the same. Ever thought about going on Jeopardy?
7.
Sportsattitude | April 29, 2008 at 4:43 pm
Yes, Pammy…we do share a love for Trivial Pursuit-like info…I must admit during my “lost 80’s” I used to be a part of Trivial Pursuit parties that started Friday night and ended Monday morning…and no one slept. Nice job picking up some “meaningful” info on the Food Network. My guess is that was likely an “Unwrapped” show they slipped in between their now heavy rotation of Paula Deen and her family slurping up to real celebrities, Giada D “dangling” over a pot of pasta, or Rachael stiffing the wait staff every where she goes…yeah, I guess I could tour America on $40 a day if I never gave the waiter or waitress a meaningful tip.
8.
Rebecca | April 29, 2008 at 7:18 pm
Ha. I always did appreciate your random facts. Unfortunately, I can rarely remember them well enough to pass along. You may need to create one of those little books. People like me buy them. I just bought “Can a guy get pregnant” the other day and it’s one of those random fact books that I find quite interesting.
9.
pamajama | April 30, 2008 at 4:48 pm
Ah, I love this entry. I’m so much more turned on by a guy who can win at Trivial Pursuit than a dude with 6-pack abs.
And I would so completely love to be a spy!
Visualizing you on the beach saying “211!” is hysterical.
10.
Pammy Girl | April 30, 2008 at 5:01 pm
Sarah: Good to know I’m not alone in those silent stares. Sometimes they’re a bit unnerving, but I kind of like knowing that I freak people out.
Travel Rat: I knew you’d be the one to trump me on this! We’d be a formidable team in any trivia game.
Billy: Looks like someone has seen ‘Jerry Maguire’ a few times, but probably not for the same reasons I have. Thanks… your site cracks me up. Especially the random photos.
Lynne: Smart isn’t exactly sexy but then again, sexy doesn’t last forever.
Spartan: OK, I was close enough with the helmet thing. You’re one of those people who knows who played 3rd base for the Pittsburgh Pirates in 1947, aren’t you?
Kacey: Believe it or not, I’m terrified of going on Jeopardy. I think I’d freeze and embarrass myself.
Sports: I’ve never understood that Europe on $40 a day thing, either. I’ve done it, of course, but only because I brought my own food or purchased a piece of bread, an orange and a Magnum bar for sustenance. I don’t eat at restaurants too often when traipsing across Europe and as for Rachel Ray? Bad tipper = someone I don’t eat dinner with.
Rebecca: I could indeed write a book of random facts. Random facts by a random person. That’s totally me!
Pamajama: While I appreciate a fellow with a six-pack, I’ve decided that the following statement is my mantra when it comes to relationships: “You may be able to live on love but you can’t retire on it.” Smart people usually have better retirement savings plans. Plus, someday that six-pack will turn into a keg and everyone knows that stupid lasts forever.
11.
Juli | May 1, 2008 at 11:50 am
I’m that dork in my crowd… always adding my two cents with information no one cares to know anything about, but that they secretly double-check in an encylopedia later. Is that why we’ve always gotten along so well?
12.
The Last Spartan | May 4, 2008 at 12:36 pm
Pammy, I would only know that piece of information if it would help me pick up a woman…
Frank Gustine, in case that’s impressive. (Yes, I looked it up to impress you)
13.
Pammy Girl | May 4, 2008 at 1:01 pm
Juli: I think our shared dorkiness is just one of the reasons why we’ve always gotten along. Toss in the bond that grows between co-workers when verbally abused by their boss and a love for chocolate and you’ve got a good base for us.
Spartan: I can’t believe you actually looked that up and yes, I’m impressed. But what’s really impressive is that you looked it up during what precious time you had available over the past few months…. bet you’re glad test #1 is over.