I Guess I’m Not a California Girl After All

The past few weeks have been quite difficult for me. My former boss (the cool one, not the psycho) recently contacted me and offered me a position in his organization. He is now the CEO and wants me to be the Senior Director of Communications. I wasn’t searching for this position so it came as quite a shock. I’ve known for quite some time that I haven’t exactly been thrilled with my life in LA but I thought I’d have more time here, so I’ve done quite a bit of soul searching.

LA has fabulous weather year-round while DC winters suck and the summers melt more than a few brain cells. I love the beach and Pink Berry is one of my favorite snacks. I get a kick out of seeing celebrities shopping at my grocery store or in the lane next to me while driving to work. I absolutely love my job and adore my co-workers. I have complete autonomy and it is quite possibly the lowest-stress job on the planet. I am grateful to have been given the opportunity to work at a university and to return to my writing roots.

But after much consideration (and LOTS of tears), I’ve accepted the offer and will return to DC in two months, starting my new job on June 22. I don’t mind telling you that I’m incredibly flattered to have been given this new and exciting opportunity: I’ll be responsible for all communication efforts and will be working with the White House on transportation issues. My boss has such faith in me; how can I not have that same faith in myself?

But I’m terrified of becoming THAT GIRL again. I was on medication for several years in DC to deal with anxiety and depression. I was angry most of the time and had absolutely zero patience. In the three years that I’ve been gone from DC, I’ve calmed down immensely. I still become greatly annoyed with traffic but doesn’t everyone. While I’m very much a Type-A person, I’m not as hyper as I once was. I’m more relaxed. I wear pink now. Pink!

I’m going back to DC and if it turns out to be a big mistake, I suppose I’ll find out soon enough. But at the moment, it’s the right thing for me to do. I’ll miss the mild weather and the sand beneath my feet, but I’ll always have the memories and know that as crazy as this move was… I did it and I can do anything.